London, welcome to America

Do you remember when Arnold Schwarzenegger won the seat of California governer in 2003? Remember all those hilarious jokes taking potshots at American celebrity culture?

Congratulations London, you’ve done exactly the same. Some time last night Boris Johnson won the election to become the new mayor of London. It seems that a man bereft of concrete feasible policies was London’s choice for governing a city of around 8 million. A man who in the past has been caught out referring to black people as “piccaninnies” with “watermelon smiles” will be in charge of a multicultural city. While other capital cities have looked to London for policies such as the congestion and emissions charges, London has voted in a man who has repeatedly rejected ideas such as the Kyoto Protocol. Somewhere between 750,000 and 2,000,000 people marched against the Iraq war in London and yet just over 1.1 million Londoners voted for a man who supported it and campaigned for Bush to win the US elections in 2000 and 2004. A common topic of Boris fans is problems with public transport, yet they voted for a man who supports rail privatisation. As the difference of quality of life widens between classes and the housing market prevents people from reaching the first rung on the property ladder, Boris wants to abolish the minimum wage and reduce the number of new houses being built. As the ill-informed complain of rising crime rates in London (when in fact, the opposite is true), they vote for someone who has unashamedly admitted to trying to cover up criminal acts by offering to have a journalist beaten up because he was investigating one of Boris’ friends for allegations of fraud. While allegations of sleaze have been levelled at Ken Livingstone in recent months, London has voted for someone who was dismissed from their posts in the Conservative party for lying to the party leader over extra-marital affairs.

So who or what is responsible for Boris’ victory? An ill-informed public, a TV show and a Tory rag. Have I Got News For You, a show meant to satirise and mock politicians, provided Boris an ample opportunity to expand his fanbase to previously inaccessible quarters and sell an image of a “lovable rogue”, while The Evening Standard has run a near-daily hatchet job on Ken Livingstone for the past 6 months.

However, the real tragedy isn’t Boris Johnson being voted in as mayor, but Ken Livingstone being voted out. I think this quote from Suttonpubcrawl on Cook’d and Bomb’d puts it more eloquently and with a damn sight less swearing than I would:

It’s official now so I’ll just say this before I go to bed. The thing that pisses me off the most about this isn’t that Boris won, but that Ken lost. Ken is a man who really cares about London. You know that London has always been his top priority and he has spent his life working for London. He’s got an excellent knowledge of the issues involved in running the city, and his ideas have improved the place. When he made a speech after 7/7 he was speaking as a Londoner which is what he’s always been. Boris doesn’t give a shit about the city, doesn’t know anything about it and only ran because he saw a political opportunity. Ken should still be the mayor. Fuck you Boris voters. Fuck you fuck you fuck you.

So well done London. You’ve really outdone yourself this election, especially when the icing on this bitter cake is the BNP gaining a seat on the London Assembly.